Black Slave Writes From Asylum

By Nick Sweet

say to the Minister bout him. He after me, I say to him. He gone kill me when he do catch up with me. The Minister he say he do sympathize with me and my problem. But I don’t can see how the Minister he can be very sympathize with me, cause he don’t do nothing. He just want me for my pussy. Fact, he don’t even see me when he with me, you axe me. All he see is pussy, nothing but one big pussy. I talk to him and it like he don’t hear. He hear but he don’t hear, you know. I frighten I tell him, cause the man is come after me. I seen him yesterday when I’s walkin on Lexington. He see me and the way he look I can tell he is been follow me. I jump into taxi and scape. But he come after me in the another taxi, you know. He come to my flat in Harlem and break in. He there waitin for me when I comin home. He is big man with face like a bear and red eyes. Them eyes he have they got the blood of all the people he done kill in them, it look like. He say he gonna take me back to the Doctor. He say the Doctor he still waitin for me back in Rwanda. He say I’s a good African girl. I got no rights bein here in New York, selling the black pussy, he say. He say whole lot of things. He very bad man. He say I only here cause the Minister sign the paper. But the Minister he only want me for pussy, he say. He right there, iz well. I tell him the Doctor he kill my mother. He chop off her legs and she gone bleed to death right fore my eyes. He kill my father iz well and my sister. Then he take me for his slave. I just a pussy to him iz well. The Doctor don’t see a person when he look at me. He like the Minister and all the rest, only he treat me worse. Whole lot worse. The man he grin and he say I been bad selling my pussy to the white man. He say my pussy a black pussy, it for black man. He say he gone have himself some a my pussy for himself. Then he gone take me back to Rwanda. I say he want pussy he can go look someplace else. There a whole big city full with pussy. He come at me and I pick up the sharp knife. He grin like it so funny and I stick it in him. He fall down. He don’t never gone get back up. I feel like I can’t feel nothing. The police they come and they rest me. They tell me I kill that man. They tell me I gone go down. You gone go down, sister, they say to me. You shoulda stuck to sellin pussy, they say to me. You gone go down for murder one, they say to me. They take me to the jail. I’s shut in there with they other girls. They lots of them sellin they pussy iz well. Seem like half the black girls I see they sellin they pussy. A lady come to speak to me. She real nice rispeckable white lady. She tell me she a lawyer and she unnerstand the way the black woman she get treat like shit. We get treat like we nothing but pussy, the nice white lady lawyer say to me. She sympathize with me, she say to me. She very sympathize. Then when it come the day to go to court, I see the Doctor himself. He come to the court to watch see what it gone happen to me. I get like I’s ascared they gonna set me free. If they set me free the Doctor he gone get me, I say to them. I’s so ascared I’s get I don’t can talk no more and I get to screamin. They take me away after that. Now here I’s sittin in the place they keepin the people they got troubles in they mind. Place for the people them crazy. Some people in here they real crazy, it sure is true. They ain’t doin no lyin bout that. But I made me one or two friends here. They black girls same iz me. Nobody is listen to them. Nobody is see them. They jus pussy. Now I am write this for to axe if anybody out there they can hear me and they can to help me. I goin crazy in this crazy place. I ain’t gone all the way crazy yet, but I’s sure on the way. Yes mama, I sure gone get there, things carry on the way they goin.

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Over the past year or so Nick Sweet’s stories have appeared in Shelf Life, Bartleby Snopes, Fertile Source and issues 117 & 118 of Evergreen Review. Earlier stories of his appeared in issue 106 of Descant and Cutthroat (summer 2007). His novel, Gemini Games, was praised by D.M. Thomas, D.J. Taylor and Andrew O´Hagan, and he is currently working on a new novel.


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